tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20213851.post115561739292005880..comments2023-06-15T06:41:53.620-05:00Comments on Expanding My Wings: Birthday Confusionbutterflygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05478785993576189511noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20213851.post-1155931924070717232006-08-18T15:12:00.000-05:002006-08-18T15:12:00.000-05:00flygirl,I think you handled it right. This goes t...flygirl,<BR/><BR/>I think you handled it right. This goes to the heart of why it takes really big people to divorce well.<BR/><BR/>In all cases, I think you do best by ignoring the dictates you don't have any control over and referring your son as you have back to his Dad.<BR/><BR/>Eventually the Lil Man is best equipped to wear him down... and he will. This entire episode is really about Dad's desire to punish you. I strongly suspect it has something to do with wanting to lessen the good time that Lil Man is likely to have at your place. Perhaps even building up the anticipation for a return to Dad's.<BR/><BR/>Unless your Ex is a real piece of work, all of this is probably happening subconsciously for him. But I don't think it changes your response, even if it isn't.<BR/><BR/>The worst thing you can do is treat your son to more toys or more joys to "even things out". You'll make him insufferable that way, I am convinced.Edwardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13740048207181691509noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20213851.post-1155735833910693422006-08-16T08:43:00.000-05:002006-08-16T08:43:00.000-05:00I just want to comment that it hurts me that his f...I just want to comment that it hurts me that his father is being so bitter about all of this. I let my little man take whatever he wants when he goes to his dads. I never tell him it has to stay here at moms. I think that is why he is confused. I told him that he needs to ask his dad why he can't bring things to his other home.<BR/><BR/>Thank you all for you support.butterflygirlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05478785993576189511noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20213851.post-1155734617971481912006-08-16T08:23:00.000-05:002006-08-16T08:23:00.000-05:00Touchy !And you had no answer.Touchy !<BR/><BR/>And you had no answer.jachttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03237327287256489526noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20213851.post-1155733010600229262006-08-16T07:56:00.000-05:002006-08-16T07:56:00.000-05:00It must have been hard on you but this isn't about...It must have been hard on you but this isn't about you, it's about your little man and what makes him happy. (Sorry, don't mean to sound so harsh) It sounds like he had a tremendous time at his dad's house and you mustn't let your bitterness creep into his relationship with his dad - just say the toys are there to play with at his dad's house, just like he has toys at your house to play with when he is there with you.<BR/><BR/>It sounds like he has a loving and close relationship with you and your time is much more important than any toy.Suehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16140521672043945207noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20213851.post-1155731323071935302006-08-16T07:28:00.000-05:002006-08-16T07:28:00.000-05:00Oh I'm so sorry, I have late Birthday wishes to th...Oh I'm so sorry, I have late Birthday wishes to the gorgeous little man of yours!!! Happy Happy 5th birthday and 5 big Ozzie hugs comming his way!<BR/>Aah, love the pirate bag! <BR/>I've been there with you, not being able to hug and cuddle on their special day but had to wait my turn, it's awfull, and sometimes I blame being a mum for it, our love is just sooo strong it's killing us! Again, hang in there!Fleahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14277854645434859624noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20213851.post-1155704871513198462006-08-16T00:07:00.001-05:002006-08-16T00:07:00.001-05:00Hugs to you - I know those moments are hard, proba...Hugs to you - I know those moments are hard, probably much harder on you than him.Bar L.https://www.blogger.com/profile/11100008292699584336noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20213851.post-1155704871218960762006-08-16T00:07:00.000-05:002006-08-16T00:07:00.000-05:00Hugs to you - I know those moments are hard, proba...Hugs to you - I know those moments are hard, probably much harder on you than him.Bar L.https://www.blogger.com/profile/11100008292699584336noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20213851.post-1155696154534519122006-08-15T21:42:00.000-05:002006-08-15T21:42:00.000-05:00I hate to be redundant, but Little Man is lucky to...I hate to be redundant, but Little Man is lucky to have such a <B>SWEET</B> mom! ~ jb///LZ Bloggerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06020844948637658050noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20213851.post-1155683445478685812006-08-15T18:10:00.000-05:002006-08-15T18:10:00.000-05:00How about telling him the truth.....It sounds bett...How about telling him the truth.....It sounds better....don't you think?......Djakehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09132178521893758480noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20213851.post-1155650469767261692006-08-15T09:01:00.000-05:002006-08-15T09:01:00.000-05:00Your love and the time spent together is most impo...Your love and the time spent together is most important... you know this flygirl, and let's guess what our good friend "Harsha" would say about the toy thing ... "I think he'll survive."Diane Ariashttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04243483259060628345noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20213851.post-1155624259303629052006-08-15T01:44:00.000-05:002006-08-15T01:44:00.000-05:00Fly girl. . . I think that I wouldn't make a big d...Fly girl. . . I think that I wouldn't make a big deal out of the toy thing. . . he will get the gist of the way things are as he gets bigger. . . he just doesn't get that there are still a lot of hard feelings between parents and families. . . There will always be things that are ok at dad's and things that are ok at mom's. . . and it is ok. . . You are doing a great job. . . <BR/>CiaoSicilianhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04478918266290454362noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20213851.post-1155621057305850282006-08-15T00:50:00.000-05:002006-08-15T00:50:00.000-05:00Thats a hard one, He sees your love and thats what...Thats a hard one, He sees your love and thats what is most important. That sucked about the toy thing.lash505https://www.blogger.com/profile/09213373741518348389noreply@blogger.com